#11: Why do you create?

Creativity is to me what a glass tank is to a goldfish: A misinterpreted home for safe, breathing space.

The Arts are a vehicle to metacognition, authenticity and reconciliation.  In that way, art expands a capacity for well-being and relationship formation beyond common affinity circles.  Still, I seldom claim Art to be my friend.  I envy people for which Art can exist so leisurely.

Sometimes the Body hides stories from the brain.  The Body knows the Brain's first priority is self-preservation, and the Body's members can absorb pain.  To keep equilibrium, the Body absorbs trauma to decrease the Brain’s cognitive load.  My Body's first language is Art, and Art is my Brain's best conduit for storytelling.

I am fortunate now because Body more quickly identifies and kick-starts coping mechanisms when
Brain processes old, uncensored stories that need restructuring before I can fully heal.  But I have not always coped this well.  And Art is still my powerful, self-advocacy tool.

Art's creation process is every bit arduous, frenzied,
wretched, honorable, stigmatizing, freeing and fantastic. 

Art and I are not friends because it demands to be seen and I just want to be heard. 

But Body sacrifices comfort to honor Brain's demands because Body understands it cannot ever be totally heard until Brain articulates all needing to be seen, and that is all of Me.


Photography © natalie rose eddings